Goodbye Princess

Princess was sold today. At a throw away price. I finally got rid of it.

Now that it has been sold, I feel like a very important stage of my life has passed.

but am i Happy??? Do you hear me say Yayyy!!!

No? you dont. Even i myself dont hear shouting with happiness. For some reasons I am not happy.

You know what. I have hated this car from the depths of my heart. I cursed it every time i had to ask people to give it a dhaaka. I cursed it every time i had to take Taxi leaving it on my flat in the morning. I cursed it every morning right after sitting on the driver seat because it always gave a dirty mark on my trouser - Actually, the distance between the steering and the driver seat is so little (or may be i am so fat) that while entering the car the steering touches my thighs and leaves a mark on my otherwise neat and clean trouser . Along with that it was always dirty from the outside as I used to wash it with the rain water and since it doesnt rain much in islamabad, it mostly remained dirty. (for those who didnt get it , i mean to say that i used to wait for rain to clean my car).I hardly ever saw it without that ever existing mud layer.

There were so many issue with this car .. and I so much wanted to sold it .. but today , when i have sold it , on a throw away price... I now feel sad.. very sad.. I have discovered something.... that somewhere during giving dhakas to this car, somewhere during cursing it for not starting up in the morning, somewhere during getting dirty by the its thick layer of mud, .. ..undeliberately ,...... unconsciously , .......unwillingly ..... i had fallen in love with it. . . I had actually started liking this non-living mechanical thing.

and i am very serious. I used to treat it like a human being. I guess i once tried to give it Reiki as well. i had a very strong connection with it which i realize now. It had become an important part of my life; a very important relationship for me. In life, our relationships with people get stronger when we share sufferings with them . This car had given me so many sufferings and I have shared so much of my sufferings with it that now i feel having a deep relationship with it.

I talked with Kashif and he told me that the way i feel is because i have lost an aim of my life. and i guess he is right. Those of you who are into Japanese Animes will be able to understand this concept. Going to the mechanic , cursing princess, trying to think the reasons for its kharabi - they had all become an integral part of my life. See my blog, every post mentions this car somewhere. Hey! i even wrote a poem on it.

Today i went to Rahat Bakery...I thought of that time few weeks back when i couldn't start the princess there..had to leave it there for the whole night. and then i started realizing that all the places i have been to in islamabad have a memory associated to this car.. Every road that i think of , reminds me of this car being pushed by a passerby with me sitting inside trying to start it on the 2nd gear. There are few speed breakers in this city that have become a land mark for me because of the impact that i got by driving princess on high speed over them.

These are all memories. Painful they were at the times they happened but now that they have turned into memories - Beautiful sweet memories - I really like them. Now i value them.

I guess all this life time that i spent with this car had some meaning for me.I am getting the meaning at the end of my relationship with it. I guess it teaches me that may be i am not cherishing the things in my life well.. There are things in our life that we take for granted. There are little things that are with us and we hate them for being there. Its their loss that tells us about their importance and what they really meant to us... The loss of the princess tells me that i need to start cherishing those things that i am taking for granted. Whats the use of complaining in life , when we can enjoy it with all it problems. Its a good lesson learnt.

Good bye princess!!! May you have a better life now.. Now that you will have someone better to take care of you.!!!

And hey Princess!! wish me luck too.. Cause i am going to have "someone" else in my life whom i will be taking care of with utmost care . Just 4 months remaining and then a new princess will be in my life.